Celeste Headlee on TedTalk said, “If you wanna get out of the conversation, get out of the conversation; but don’t be half in it and half out of it.” This reminder echoes at me whenever I speak with someone at a hallway—a common place where people have their small chat. She emphasizes the importance of focus while in a conversation, stating “Be present. Be in that moment.”
Oftentimes, when we speak in public spaces for a small chat we can get distracted by people walking and passing by. Our eyes may look around the people or the environment instead of staying focused on the person who’s speaking. When we remain distracted while the person is talking, we can all predict what the other person would feel. As Headlee said, if you can’t stay in the conversation and be in that moment, then it’s better to get out of it.
It may be that simple for regular conversations, but what about for interpersonal communications with HCA and the person/s, and HCA and colleagues, when you need to maintain professionalism? Surely, you can’t just get out of the conversation when you’re highly needed in it. Lea Salonga, a multi-awarded-winning international singer/actress, gave advice to kids competing for The Voice Philippines, “When you perform, throw your problem far away, out of sight, out of grasp,” so that you can be in that moment during your performance. Suffice it to say, there’s no ‘Take 2’ once you’re live on stage! Probably, this speaks the same for our job as HCA. If our personal issues can be set aside, then leave it aside to perform a better job at work. However, in instances where these issues keep on creeping into our mind, distracting us from the job entrusted upon us, due to the emotions and many challenges attached to it, then it’s better to ask for a leave, do self-care, ang get back better than before.
As HCA, we empathize with our clients and listen effectively. Reflect back the messages expressed by the person, and to do reflective listening. Reflect back and reflective listening have different meaning. To reflect back is to demonstrate comprehension of the listener to the speaker in both verbal and nonverbal forms. To listen reflectively is to ‘seek to hear and comprehend the perspective of the person’ and show this comprehension to the person with both verbal and nonverbal messages (O’Toole, 2020). Listening takes an effort, doesn’t it?
SELF-AWARENESS
One way of the ways I can enhance my self-awareness is to write a journal. Yes, it adds to my day as I haven’t written a journal in a while. I write articles but haven’t written my own journal in years. Doing so means extra time for a day. Writing a journal means having a quiet space to reflect. Setting the environment is important for me. I would wake up in the middle of the night, sometimes 1 o’clock in the morning or 3 o’clock in the morning when everyone’s asleep. After cleaning myself and some household chores, I switch our two warm lamps to see how clean our living room and dining area are, then I curl up my legs to sit at our dining table. I know I just can’t write a journal when I’m tired. So, when I start my day, my mind is clear, I can reflect on yesterday’s lesson. On the other hand, when I’m not yet exhausted in the evening, I start writing to eliminate the task of waking up earlier than usual on the following day. It’s important for me to deliver this journal demonstrating good amount of effot in it than write a few sentences just for the sake of submission.
I also can’t be a perfectionist because if I do, then maybe I won’t be able to submit a single journal! In my twenties, I was a perfectionist. I was easily angered by someone’s slowness or lack of common sense, or even of myself. Recalling how I was a perfectionist back then and the situations where I demonstrated this attitude allows me to recognize its many potential hazards and wreckage it can do in relationships and situations. Truth is, in this imperfect world, there is no such thing as perfect. It doesn’t leave less regard, however, on the quality of work that we do. Our quality of work reflects our personality, too. It’s just that, now in my maturity, I value grace (and patience) toward others more than perfection. And I value professionalism, too! Nevertheless, our output should still demonstrate effort that can never be belittled.
I am aware of my excitement to work as HCA. According to a few people I talked to, they’re more excited about the pay and HCA job that never goes out, but not the responsibilities in the job itself. When I watch YouTube channels, I find videos of nurses complaining about their jobs. I hear all these. I read all these. In another spectrum, I also read post of health care professionals who love their job! I rejoice with those who pass their exams. Peeking at these two polarized opinions about health care job allows me to be aware of the good and bad of this profession and how it can impact my perspective, performance, and priorities.
As for me, I’m excited about HCA job as it’s a taste of how it’s like to work in a health care environment! It’s a blessing to find a shorter program to test the waters, than diving into a vast sea of the unknown with a longer program. I am looking forward to helping, assisting, talking, effectively listening, and giving my interpersonal skills to those who need it. My sister who also works as a support worker once told me, “These people are willing to pay just so someone can help them.” It’s in some way a sad reality. Willing to pay just so someone can help them—is like a desperate cry for help when nobody else can be there at the moment than HCAs.
CONCLUSION
Listening is not only grasping the words heard but also the emotions communicated by the client. Hearing is different from listening, and listening involves tuning in to the person—consciously focusing on the person, which is also called attending listening. Self-awareness can be developed through journaling, asking for feedback and being open to constructive criticisms.
As I end this journal, I recognize that I only have one life to live. With many chances in a lifespan but only one life to be alive, I desire to make this life count.